It hurts like hell, but worse, because it takes absolutely forever for the flow to finally come, women end up thinking we are in there taking a dump.Ĥ. You gotta stand above the toilet with your dick aimed somewhere just left of the handle, trying to push it down, while willing yourself soft, while also forcing out the pee that doesn’t want to come down your urethra because your bladder locks up once your penis is primed to ejaculate. Have you ever tried to pee with an erection? No, you haven’t, and it freaking sucks. Peeing with an erection is more difficult than raising a child. When my jeans are pulled down and reach my shoes and won’t come off, most every woman reacts to that with the kind of exasperated frustration a toddler gives when you tell them it’s time to move on from Velcro sneakers.ģ. So while I’ve unzipped a hundred or so pairs of brown boots, or at least tugged on them and angled them upward as the girl I’m with wiggles her foot out, no one has ever, ever unlaced a pair of my Clarks. Almost no woman ever removes a guy’s shoes. Typically, the guy begins by taking off the lady’s shirt, then he probably unbuckles her bra, and then she unbuttons the guy’s shirt, and then he takes off their pants. Ever since Adam and Eve recognized their original shame and clothed themselves, and then Adam made sexual advances toward Eve while she was still pissed about the whole “how the hell am I supposed to keep two leaves on my breasts all the damn time?” thing, there’s been a natural progression when sex happens.
We deal with a double standard about undressing, specifically shoe removal.